First glance: Familiarity breeds contempt
Ford has a couple of the best-designed cars on the market today -- the Mustang and the GT. Singular designs with a cohesive vision driving every choice. The Five Hundred seems to have emerged from a completely different company. From stem to stern, the Five Hundred is undistinguished and generic. There's nothing particularly wrong with the design, it just takes no risks and offers nothing in return. You won't spend a lot of time in your garage gazing longingly at the Five Hundred, admiring its arched roofline, big taillights or body-colored front and rear bumpers. Your teenager will not doodle pictures of the Five Hundred on his notebook during math class. We're talking transportation here, not the stuff of daydreams.Perhaps Ford is making a wise choice, driving down the middle of the road with the Five Hundred, rather than choosing a lane like the Chrysler 300, a car with a polarizing design. The Five Hundred opens itself up to unflattering comparison by its lack of design distinction. It's not as cool as the 300; not as modern as the new Toyota Camry; not as classy as the VW Passat -- the kinds of comparisons that don't enhance the Five Hundred at all. That's the problem with familiarity: It breeds contempt.
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In the Driver's Seat: Plain is OK, poor quality isn't
My big complaint with my test vehicle was fit and finish on the interior. The dash was lumpy and ill-fitting. There's a handy pop-up compartment on the top of the dash -- on my vehicle, the lid had several ugly bubbles, didn't close properly and looked just awful. Several other places on the dash had uneven gaps and seams where disparate materials met. I can just imagine how sloppy the whole interior is going to look in a few years, especially after some hard use by a family.
On the Road: CVT is Five Hundred's best feature
The best news on the Five Hundred is its continuously variable transmission (CVT). Most automatic transmissions on cars are planetary geared transmission -- that is, they have a number of distinct clutches, gearsets and speeds. The gears and clutches keep the engine's revolutions per minute (rpm) at the right level to provide power for the conditions. A CVT doesn't have traditional gears or speeds -- it has pulleys and belts that allow it to precisely match rpm to demand without jolting or lurching between gears. A well-designed CVT can be more efficient and smoother than a planetary transmission, with fewer parts and simpler operation. CVTs are common on tools, on tractors and on scooters, and will be showing up on more and more cars in the future. Leonardo da Vinci actually designed a CVT in one of his sketches in 1490, so the concept has been around for a long time.The Five Hundred's CVT does the job very well -- if you didn't know it had one, you'd probably think it just had a very slick conventional tranny. Combined with a transparent All-Wheel Drive system, Five Hundred is sure-footed and smooth on the road. There's a little more float and body roll to the chassis than I like -- I prefer a stiffer ride with more road feel.
Journey's End: Will it stand out by blending in?
Excitement is in the eye of the beholder. I want more style for my $30k; you may find the Five Hundred to your liking. Ford sold a lot of Tauruses over the years, and I always thought that car was bland to the point of ugliness. To me, the real Ford Five Hundred was the 1957 Ford Fairlane 500 Convertible with its retractable hard top. That car had greatness: beautiful lines, high-tech features (for its day), and unforgettable ambiance. I can't imagine waxing nostalgic about the 2006 Ford Five Hundred in 49 years. Let's make an appointment -- I'll see you at the car show in 2055.
